Do you have insecurities? I do.
Do you struggle with having an adequate and appropriate self-image of yourself? Sure, at times, we all do. It’s amazing how much our view of ourselves affects so many other aspects of our lives. Our self-worth, confidence, attitude, outlook, posture, ambitions, all stem from our insecurities, fears, and how we view ourselves.
Insecurities are tough. They aren’t fun to talk about, but I believe by getting a few out in the open, we can shed some new light and perspective on the lies we believe that create these insecurities and poor self-image.
I am viewed as a confident person. A guy with many talents and abilities, and someone who has his “stuff” together. Those are all wonderful things and it’s nice to hear them, but it’s interesting to think that if my insecurities rested in those things, I probably wouldn’t even be able to accept those compliments. And that’s probably how it is for many of us.
Has someone called you talented and you responded, “I’m not that good”? Or has someone called you beautiful and you simply didn’t believe them? Do you hear what your friends say, then see someone else in the mirror?
I have insecurities too. And it just so happens that one of them is from the those compliments above. God has gifted me musically, in a lot of areas where things are hard for most people, it just seems to come naturally to me. I’ve been praised a lot about my musical capabilities. So you may think that I would walk in a whole heck of a lot of confidence because of that, but the truth is, I struggle with that confidence every time I play. But before we go deeper, let me first define the part of insecurity that I’m talking about.
The definition of insecurity that haunts me is: Fear of being discovered as inadequate, ill-fitted or unsuited to meet responsibilities…
That is a major struggle for me. If I know I’m bad at something, then I have nothing to lose, and it’s easy for me to admit that I’m bad. But the fear, for me, comes when I’m supposed to be good at something and then I have to come through…when I’m expected too. The truth is, I know that I am talented and gifted, but man, sometimes there is a loud voice in my head taunting me that I’m about to be found out as a fake, a phony, and a failure. And that once I fail, they won’t accept me anymore.
I’ll be honest, that voice has paralyzed me before. I have let that fear stop me from growing, maturing, taking necessary risks, and from reaching my full potential. When I allow my fear to have a megaphone and become louder than God’s voice in my life, I lose sense of who I really am. I start to find my identity in my inadequacies, short-coming, and failures. Take it a step further, I’ll say that I start to find my identity in a lie.
We must realize that voice is a lie. And the only way to regain a correct self-image and take away the fear’s impact is to silence it.
How to silence the voice of insecurity:
The first thing you need to do, in order to silence the voice of insecurity and fear is:
If you don’t recognize it, how can you stop it? But my guess is we all know that voice in our lives. We all know our fears and insecurities, so this shouldn’t be too hard. Once you recognize what that voice sounds like in your life, you can focus on making the changes.
The second thing you need to do to silence that voice is to correct the fear (cause it’s lying to you):
Know how to define yourself. If you don’t know how to define yourself, others will do it for you. And I can tell you that they will re-define, mis-define, and under-define you every single time. Your worth and your identity rest in Christ…no one else. You have to know who you are. This is so crucial to having a correct and proper self-image.
“For if a man belongs to Christ, he is a new person. The old life is gone. New life has begun.” 2 Cor. 5: 17
“But to all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God.” John 1:12
“You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you.” John 15:16
“For in Christ lives all the fullness of God in a human body. So you also are complete through your union with Christ, who is the head over every ruler and authority.” Col. 2:9-10
“So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1
“For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” Eph. 2:10 [emphasis mine]
“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Phil. 4:13
And Thirdly, after knowing who you are…do not stop telling yourself it.
- Remind yourself of who you are OFTEN.
If you have to tape a bunch of verses on your bathroom mirror, in order to remind yourself, then do it. But keep those encouraging and truthful words in front of you as much as you can.
“I really believe that at the end of the day we are stuck in this pattern where we want to learn something but we want to apply nothing…We want to be entertained and motivated only to do nothing.” Pete Wilson
You can do something! You can fight back. You can apply what you know to do and see results. The voice of insecurity and fear will constantly try to show its face in your life, and you need to protect yourself. You need to be able to silence that voice whenever it tries to tear you down. You need to be loaded and ready to shoot down whatever attack it may come at you with. Know your Scripture. Know what God says about you and who you are called to be.
“So God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.” Gen. 1:27
This last verse is crucial. We have heard it as a verse that explains our identity, but it does a lot more than just that. This verse not only speaks to your worth, it speaks to your destiny. This verse is reason we are here. It’s our purpose.
Whatever your insecurity or fear is, silence it. Allow no one but God to define who you are and what your worth is. Gen. 1:27 doesn’t just speak to a shared attribute or ability with God, it speaks to our mission.
To reflect the image of God.
“You were made in His image so that you could reflect His glory, His grace, His love, and His compassion to a watching world.” Pete Wilson
Don’t believe the lies. Don’t believe your fears. Silence them. Reflect God. Your security is found in Him.
How can we help each other? Care to share a fear or insecurity of your own? Let’s pray for each other.